Getting ON with it

For the last year, the last few months more so, I've had an increasing sense of just how short our time here is. Not a dwelling in morbidity, but a real feeling-awareness of how fast the finality of being in this body comes.
And an urgency.
Even if I live the full length of my natural life span, my time here is already more than half over. That feels like a heavy but necessary awareness, because, maybe we all need to get more ON with it.
I have "no idea where the time went" I do know I spent so much of it waiting, for ...myself, really. For permission. For self belief. To be enough. And all things to be, right. MORE.
More reasonable, more practical. More money. More guaranteed outcomes before risk taking. And so much time spent worrying about stuff that just doesn't matter. 

Sometimes we have to allow ourselves to be pulled by what is, rather than held by what isn't.

I will be packing my bags and heading back to Scotland, twice this summer!  
At the end of May I'll be spending a week at the Findhorn Foundation, a place I've known of since I was right about 10 years old, when I picked up a book with full page photos of magically enormous flowers and vegetables, and had my young self's certainty of earth magic, and fairies confirmed.
And again for just about 2 months toward the end of summer, for some deep time and slow travel. I'm really excited about spending a few weeks in Orkney! I have no idea where it will lead ...but it will lead somewhere, of that there is no doubt.
(I will have laptop in hand, and be coaching from afar!)

Change is inevitable. But we humans, so enamored of control, simultaneously long for, and dread it, don't we? Always desirous of control and certainty ...thats me.
I would be lying if I didn't also say that this jumping off is scary shit. For real.
I know how I want -intend for it all to turn out. And I have no idea if, and how it will ...

Intending with an open palm ...
It's a hair fine and fluid line, an edgy kind of dance, isn't it?

  • What change is pulling you?

  • What is steadily murmuring of its need to be expressed?

  • Where is excitement pointing?